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updates for 6 month+

2009-06-29T17:44:00.002+08:00

milestones:

1) car crashed for the 2nd time

2) graduated from polytechnic, diploma attained!

3) going army at 9th july 09

and still penniless

saying bye-bye to my 19 years on earth

2008-12-28T23:06:00.005+08:00

cos its my 20th birthday yesterday

lets cut it short with a summary

10+: went for blood donation, no pics

2+: went with hs and dede for some free meal at din tai fung

sissyboy reading the menu and complaining how expensive it is, cos im the one who pulled him out of his buffet-is-always-value-for-money mindset

me and ded playing with chopsticks to kill the waiting time

minced noodles and sour-spicy soup as appetizers

this is the star attraction, the yam paste xiao-long-bao
check out the contents

the taste, is heavenly
look at the chopstick with the contents, looks like poo :D

all of them look the same, and you have to rip open them to tell what's inside

this is the one with pork

this is the one with crabmeat

the hollow 'shell', took me some time to suck everything up

and our wrong order, vegetable something bun
bland, tasteless

total bill is about $70++, with:

20 pork ones
20 yam paste ones
6 crab meat ones

by the three of us

and i ate for free!

i love you two faggots~

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Din_Tai_Fung

then, when i reach home at about 5+, bro told me to collect a cake for him
woah, its for me, a tiramisu cake from bakerzin

grrrrr.....

i dont know how to smile, so mom had to do this

dad or bro tickled me, no idea who it was

raped by both of them

the other two photos from of me and 2 of my relatives, i dont dare to put it here
i look fugly

from my lovely God-ma

an angpow and a beautiful watch
woah, niceeeeeeee

and about 11+, i went to a forumer's house for xmas bbq

and went with a few of them to west coast park

reached home at about 4+

i tell u, this is my best birthday ever

i received so many SMSes

sure feels like im already 21 years old though

20 years on earth

getting old already~~~~~

and, woahwoahwoah, miss world, miss russia

<3 <3 <3

people say all men are perverts

they could not be more wrong

da weekend

2008-12-22T01:10:00.002+08:00

although i woke up late on the weekend (saturday 1230pm sunday 3pm), my weekend is still well spent and used up nicely

the outing with the people of the forums started at 12:30, and i woke up at 12:30, lol

reached there at about 3+, and had to change parking lots from the singapore flyer to marina square, cos the parking price is too farking expensive

and then, we are so poor that we shared the free-flow cup

next, i headed to fetch the nigger to watch fart's performance

her makeup is damn scary la, like some bride-wh0-got-murdered-and-came-back-for-revenge-but-makeup-many-many

and lastly, i went to grandma's hse, and saw the three nerds making tang-yuan (Glutinous rice balls or something)

the first pic was perfect, except that my finger was blocking the view

grandma put on cute/funny poses, but she moved too much and blurred it, haha

aw well, better than nothing

the output:

and sunday, i watched the semi-finals of the asean(not asian) cup of singapore vs vietnam with joel and nigger

and singapore lost 0-1

although i managed to get the student price of $2 for the admission (mine was supposed to be $6, tertiary student), my total damage was:

diesel= almost $10
carl's jr(the 2 idiots upsized mine =_=) = $14

and theres a superstition here that if your wallet is torn, you'll have to change it fast, as your money will come 'falling off'

you better believe it, my funds are dropping fast

pics of the weekend:

think this is about the size of the players from the place im sitting on

now, where's a new wallet?

quitting gambling, the process

2008-12-16T00:44:00.002+08:00

i tell you, quitting gambling is about the same as quitting drugs, other than the withdrawal symptoms which includes vomiting headache etc etc

i had to overcome endless temptations of football(soccer)

and just when i started to quit, ASEAN cup comes

and champions league

and weekly BPL

i had to force my mind off by blasting music, or doing something that will make me lose thought of betting

like spending on other things

wtf, its an endless cycle all over again

i need to save more, and fast

yeah, thanks bro's friend!

budget mission

2008-11-24T02:13:00.001+08:00

time and again, i have lost................... on the quest to save money
lets say, i wanted to save 40 in a week
and i end up spending 80 on the same week

so now, my cash balance is like 17 bucks

i feel so emo i am gonna kill myself

moi gonna stop gambling till january 31st

but i cant think of any punishment if i spend overload again

help me think of some

meanwhile, from curly, the new bruce lee

retro attack

2008-11-20T01:12:00.002+08:00

woah, work stress

and thanks to mtv, i am hooked on retro songs, especially this

from the soundtrack of one of the best movies of all time, GHOSTBUSTERS!

hs's belated birdday

2008-11-18T00:42:00.006+08:00

16/11/08, went for hansheng's belated birthday meal at suki sushi in cineleisure, with jianxun tagging along, moi driving, of course

i desperately need someone to split the cost with me (shhhhh)
ok, let the pictures do the talking

veteran sushi expert hs mentioned time and again: "DON'T EAT THE ONES WITH THE RICE, U WILL GET FULL FASTER, THEN IT WILL NOT BE WORTH THE CASH"

btw, its a sushi buffet, with a 17.90++, per pax (with gst, service charge)

this things stuffed with sweet potato are kinda nice

and the wasabi made me tear for quite a number of times

belated birthday boy cannot control the spicyness, lol

eeeeee, squid

i dunno why dickhead jx likes this, its so-so, but abit bland, haha

this two pics below are one of the best in the 'new menu', greens rolled up with ham

appealing to the tongue

maybe its nice to get rid of the raw food after a short while(its cooked, the ham)

jx savoring

moi looking blur

yuck, i am not eating that

u know, we didnt know that it was too hot in the beginning(below), and the little toppings were like moving around, and we thought it's ALIVE

doraemon's favourite food, dorayaki(??)

this is super, the prawns are real fresh too

JAPANESE TAUPOK LOLOL

11 cream puffs from me, 3-4 from hs, and 1 from jx (he hates it)

me testing how hard the ice cream is

all 3 of us agreed that we ate like hungry ghosts

the total bill is about 70.55 bucks, and jx and me split the bill to half
its quite nice, filling, and worth every buck

8/10

the remaining 2 points goes to the rather slow service
its kinda fast at the first hour, but slow after that
methinks they had some quota
like overloading some amount, and they will be like, not serving a particular table deliberately, or they will lose out or something like that

but i swear, we musta have eaten like more than 130 bucks of sushi and etc

and as we go back to the van

i saw THIS on my windscreen:

WTF PARKING SUMMON(TICKET), I AM GOING TO FARKING WAIVE THIS OFF (if i can), so nigel, ahem ahem

then, we were too full, and the 2 goons decided on going to the Henderson Wave for a quick stroll to work off the bloat

HOLY CRAP IT WAS AN AMAZING SIGHT
and to think i am the only person in the van who haven't walked there before =_=
3 for hs, 2 for jx i think

we then parked, and off we go!

this is one of the funniest sights we saw
its like, the baby is concealed, and as the parent(i think) walked, the baby's chin is like constantly bouncing on his back

10 mins of laughter :D

monkeys are rare there, so many people took photos of em

hs insisted on a couple of pictures for mementos

jx and hs, notice the height
i wonder if jx grew taller, its quite a long time since we went out like this
190cm? hohoho

walking up the Mount Faber Hill extension, with my unique monkey walking style

and that is when we saw THIS
WTFWTFWTF

the camwhores and attendees for the day
wow, its really quite some time since we went out, like over a year
we only kept in touch via msn, jx is always busy
but a well spent sunday afternoon, with my pals
i knew them for seven years++, can u believe it?

good thing the 3 of us are still keeping in touch
good friends are hard to find, and pals are even harder

*hint hint, my birthday's on 27 dec ^^

photography

2008-10-30T23:21:00.004+08:00

i think i am greatly influenced by zhao wei the dog

all of a sudden, when i saw the new lumix digital camera at the newspapers digital life, i can feel the gian-ness of having one

http://www.panasonic.net/avc/lumix/systemcamera/gms/g1/index.html

red looks so cool, but sexpensive

heard its about $1100++

updates

2008-10-21T00:14:00.005+08:00

too busy (lazy) to update this blog, so i'll come up with the recent updates i can think of

september till october, i forgot

but the very very recent ones are friday's geylang dimsum with yibin, jess, nigel, joel and moi

and we went to kallang bowl, played 3 games

3 musketeers...
nigger's model pose...
joel's so-fast-shot-that-the-camera-cannot focus-properly
tell jess to stay on that pose for 5 mins
first game is over, and I'm the highest, muahahahaha
2nd game in progress, and you can see that the 2 goons are getting competitive
final score of the 2nd game, jess won, with 115

and then, the sexciting 3rd and last game, with joel grabbing the highest score with 133
lol, looks like im the lowest score for the winners

and everyone told me i have a sissy style in bowling, which is slow ball movement

LIDDAT IS CALL TECHNIQUE OK!!!!

ok, off to bed

working at mha( minstry of home affairs btw)

learning a new program called microsoft sharepoint, so far so good

but the presentation with the director tomorrow is driving me nuts

i'll need all the energy for tml

hs, if you see this post, please call me to get the alumni card, i keep forgetting to call u

PAINTBALL PAINTBALL PAINTBALL!!

2008-08-13T21:40:00.003+08:00

paintball was a blast!

thanks to the people who attended, jess, yibin, nigel, joel, jess's neighbour (i think), liyan, and moi

we arranged to meet at khatib mrt..............

and it turns out that jess is late

but thanks to my unusual early arrival time, we managed to get everything ready on time,muahahahha

we booked the place at 5pm, and we started at about 5:05pm, not bad eh?

heres the place:

seriously, you people should really go to this place for paintball, the service is good, and friendly staff, and a lot of safety checks

everything went smoothly, thanks to the staff, and us, of course!

briefing area, like they talk to us on how to use the marker, or 'gun'
i am so crazily interested that i'm thinking of working there, so damn fun

ok, brief over, let's shoot!

since we're all noobs, we did the novice field:

there are 2 more fields, the speedball and the scenario field, but maybe next year i'll pay a visit there again, cos its just too sexpensive, at fifty bucks~~~~~~

*feels faint

round 1and round 2, we just have to shoot down a certain cone on the opponent's side of the field, and grab a certain flag on our respective sides, and run back to base. if that happens, we win

round 3 and 4 are about the same, but we have to retrieve an extra foam brick back.

round 1, start!

knn, i just hide there, and aimed the cone, and evading the gay bullets, and then it's over, team 2 wins, with yibin, jess, jess's fren and liyan

WTF? I ONLY WASTED LIKE LESS THAN 10 BALLS

then came round 2, i bucked up, really!

as we know more about the field, we seperated to 3 formations, joel and we went to the left, and nigel to the right, i shot the cone down, and joel went for the flag

but joel was shot and he had to drop the flag, and nigel was still holding them down, so i grabbed the flag and chiong to the base, but they hit me on the back foe the first time, OUCH

yes, it hurts, it hurts real bad, but you'll soon get used to it, in the 2nd shot

and in the end, i think i ran back to touch the base, and retrieve the flag again

and round 1, team 2 won (we are team 1 btw, consisting of joel, nigel and me)

round 2 and 3, team 1 (us) won

and round 4, they won, cos i have no strength already, the mask, is suffocation moi

and then, we have this "final match" to determine the winner

very very sexciting, we cant even move anywhere, gunfire was everywhere, and then no sounds were heard, you know why?

COS THEY RAN OUT OF BULLETS, HAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHHA

and we won easily, apart from grabbing the brick and flag, we also have to poke this flag to the center of the field

and joel did it, and nigel ran out of bullets too, lol

and yesh, we won, with the waiting game, lol

and because we had some leftover bullets.......... ok, balls, we can use them for target shooting, i didnt do it because i'm too shagged, cos of the mask

ok, i'm weak, i'm weak, happy?
that's not anyone, i just merely took a pic from the site

and this is the bath quarters, which i cant take a bath cos its too late, 6+ btw, and i just changed to clean clothes and be on my way

and took the bus home instead of the mrt, cos i wanna save money, and i won 45 bucks on football too :D

and yes, peekture time

very very fun, definitely will go back there again

thanks for the friendliness and service, Red Dynasty!

here's their web: http://weplaypaintball.com/index.html

WHY SO SERIOUS??

2008-07-20T17:01:00.004+08:00

the dark knight is like wooooooooooooo

4.8/5

the 0.2 is for my nothing-is-perfect movie rating

everything is pieced-in nicely, without any loopholes in lack of plot and stuffs

oh yeah, two-face's part is too short, hence the 0.2

i expected more of him, i love his grossed-out-burned-until-bbq-face

the directer, and the staff did a good job

could just be the best movie this year, but i need to watch hellboy2, the mummy 3, for further information hunting

and yes, the recent buzz of miss universe:
this is Miss France, Miss Laura Tanguy

WALAO, SHE IS EVEN PRETTIER THAN MISS VENEZUELA OR VENEZUEUE OR WHATEVER SOUTH AMERICAN COUNTRY GIRL

WHY DID SHE LOSE, WHY WHY WHY

she didn't even make it to the top 10, wtf?

ok, ok, France could be overrated, but i like, cannot izzit?

want to fight? huh? huh?

makan post

2008-06-27T22:39:00.003+08:00

went for billy bombers today

yes yes, i am such a suaku, 1st time going there also

best cheese fries, even better than kfc's, lol, but they need heat it more
waffles with ben and jerry's dunno what flavor, luckily sheng stopped us to take a pic, or else isk and moi would have finished it all up

banana split!
the ice cream is 4/10, while the banana is good
and i gotta say something for singapore's air-conditioned food courts.

i wonder if the fruits used for orange juice is made of gold, a super duper mini wooper cup (below) costs...............................................

2 bucks

WTF???

no eyeing at my sis, please

and isk belanja(treated) us for the meal, cool!
thanks man, you're the best.

updates

2008-06-21T02:33:00.002+08:00

i am back from hong kong!

and holidays, going for my attachment (work) interview, and almost ending holidays :(

as many people would ask, why did i put such a dark blogskin?

that's a few of the default ones wat, im too lazy to find something i like, and also, blogskins.com offers too many kiddy ones, about whatever emo, whatever suicide, whatever love, whatever that is ahem, KIDDISH

so, i would prefer to just keep it like this

and black is just fine, unlike yellow, and pink, yeech

cinema stigma

2008-06-05T03:57:00.002+08:00

i just checked my height, and i'm not growing anymore, still 172cm

and then i think that i will never step in the cinemas of jurong point anymore, not for a long time

i just finished watching The Chronicles of Narnia: Prince Caspian with my brother(yes, the real one) on a late night movie at jurong point

surprisingly, there are not that many people inside, and i thought the school holidays for kids is still ongoing

as usual for most movie trips, i would buy the typical nachos + sprite, and it's all mine, bro doesn't want it, suggested that it's too S-I-N-F-U-L, aka fat-ish

yesh, so it's all mine, MINE

i finished up almost everything even before the movie starts, i'm such a glutton

and i realized that nachos with COLD cheese tastes even better than the ones with the warm cheese, probably because i have a weird tongue

for 2 agonizing hours, i kept fidgeting around my seat, squirming like theres a million scorpions on my ass

for what reason? BECAUSE THE SEATS ARE TOO SMALL

you don't even have enough leg space in front, and you will only have a little excess space in front when you sit in an upright position, which is soooo not my style

IMAGINE SOMEONE SITTING ON THE MIDDLE SECTION WANTS TO GO TO THE TOILET, AND HE/SHE WOULD HAVE TO SQUEEZE ALL THE VIBES OF HIS/HER BODY JUST TO HEAD TO THE TOILET

and the side armrest areas, i have to go thru so much physical contact with the person beside me

which is so awkward la

in the end, i spent the whole time lifting my leg up almost all the time, and adjusting my ass

and yes, the cushion, is machiam made of STONE

it was a great movie 4.2/5, but i cant even seem to enjoy it fully

i find the battle scenes too typical, too braveheart, too LOTR

the fighting scenes are much similiar to LOTR: the two towers, where the characters gather to protect helm's deep

nevertheless, its a great movie

i found out that the greatest asset of customers going back to the cinema is not because of the ambiance or the movie, its because of the comfy level

i watched the forbidden kingdom at cathay cineleisure some time ago, and i can still remember the spacious comfort the cinema offers

and sound system, and picture quality, they won hands down

as for the other organization, Eng Wah cinemas, i don't usually go there often, but quite positive feedbacks from me

and so, my rating for cinemas

eng wah: 7/10
cathay: 9.5/10
golden village: 5.5/10 (even their cinemas in vivocity sucked big time, the air conditioners are like heat generators)

and yes, i am very very particular about the quality of the cinema, cos i am a paying customer and consumer, and we are also giving them face for putting up with their increase of ticket prices (again)

don't everyone do?

high

2008-05-24T02:01:00.004+08:00

no idea why i felt like that.

i feel, good

in the middle of the night, isn't that gay?

maybe that's because i've gotten rid of all the weeds in my system, all the banes of my mind, all the troubles, and all the fucked-up stuffs that has been happening to me lately

i feel sucky in the daytime, but feel high at nighttime.

i dunno, maybe its because of the weather?

oh yeah, and schoolwork doesn't count, i'm coping 35% currently, programming sucks, as usual

the funny thing about the previous post is that, so many of these so called 'friends' i have helped before, and none heeded my advice

and the ending? this so called 'friend' had a broken relationship, and almost committed suicide

i am laughing, oh yes i am

laughing at their stupidity, which there is no cure for

i'm wondering, why are there so many idiots in this society nowadays?

is it because they're desperate? is it because they're in love?

oh wait, never, never, NEVER use the word love so easily

in my dictionary, it will not be used so fluently by you bastardy dickheads, because you fuckers don't even know the meaning of this word

it is underrated, it is used by immature, self-centered kids of feeble mentality and knowledge of the world

and yes, i am talking about the fucking kids of singapore, who only cares about themselves, without a care for the world, their parents, and everyone beside them, only thinking that the world revolves around them, and everything is all about me, me and me

and when problems arises, they would just think that nobody is helping, and they are always right

my cousin, got involved with a r/s, with this crappy looking kid, who is 15, and she is 14

i don't care a hoot, but look at the situation

she say she loves him

you saw the L word

now read below

they were together for close to 5 months, and in the same school

and kept in touch through sms

but look here, LOOK HERE

they NEVER went out together, NOT EVEN ONCE

and yeah, holding hands for less than 10 times

then i ask you readers, if this is love, then what is marriage? just a kiss?

NOTHING TO SPICE UP A R/S, can you fucking believe it?

whatever, that's not the case

anyway, back to the topic.

self centered kids, of singapore.

not really singapore, but around the world, the ones who are un-third-world-country kids

the upbringing, is terrible

the parents only care about money, and dump the kids to their parents

then if the guys and girls here, or in any country, if you are whining why you can't get a gf/bf, ask yourself this

when was the last time you were not selfish? when was the last time you give, and not take? when was the last time you think about others before you?

this is no wonder, rich businessmen and businesswomen are not taking any chances, and looking for companionship in developing countries

why? because they are much more selfless, and not care much about the finer things in life

just remember, a life is more important than material things in life

look at the recent Sichuan incident, and tell the difference between us, the 'richer' folks, and them

they could be 'richer' than us in other perspectives

think about it

and about the kids nowadays, if you're the denying one, or if you are the one,

go find something to hang yourself, or something

you should not even live in the first place

and screw human rights, you are not even fit to use that

and if you're the rare ones in this world, you know who i'm referring to

congrats

people in relationships

2008-05-15T01:32:00.002+08:00

there is something that really pisses me off.

and that is people in relationships.

but not myself, i don't even plan to have one.

most guys, usually the ones who claimed to be 'in love', tend to forget everything beside them, and would only think of the particular 'her'

as a result, friends who care and step in to help, would often be regarded as a 'love rival' or even a busybody

which is what pisses me off

recently, there's this case about a guy i met in a local forum, named jeremy.

he was in love with some girl.

yeah, i love to help, especially when that someone happens to be a good friend.

i stepped in to be closer to the girl, to know her better, and find some ways to help him.

as a result, the girl 'likes' me, in the boy-girl kind of way

and yeah, she told him, and he was crying on the phone with me

and he asked me if i liked her

this was the time i stopped, and think, where would i go for the extra mile to help?

then, i told him yes.

as a result, he freaking said 'don't ever call me again', and hanged up

wtf is this?

angry with me because of this?

do you even fucking think i would choose friendship over some crazy smoking bitch?

i can't believe a good friendship would be gone so instantly, so brittle, so ridiculous, just because of someone between us

you know what? screw everything, even if you come begging me or whatever fuck, my reply will be this:

"GO FUCK YOURSELF"

i hope you have failed relationships for the rest of your life, and forever waiting for her, even when she's married, or divorced, or becomes a whore

and the worse thing is, i even helped that bitch to quit smoking, and quit her other bad habits for her own fucking good, and YOU encouraged her, to smoke

oh, i forgot, you smoke too

let me tell you this, faggot, whether you see this or not

i have nothing with smokers, but i loathe fat bastards like you who smoke

end of story, i already deleted you from my contacts list, you're not even fucking worth it

have fun barking like a dog beside her, while only a pat on your pathetic head by her is enough for you to live an unrealistic life

ok, here's story 2.

i have a group of close friends, which is iskandar, khairul and han sheng.
han sheng had a history. but let's summarise it.

he liked some girl in secondary school, and because of that, he would always throw us aside, leaving us alone just to get close to her

but early this year, he gave up, and he was pissed with her.

since he's a very very very good friend, i'll let this pass

now there's khairul.

because of his attachment (work), and his girlfriend, he spends lesser time with us, or maybe even none. weekdays work, weekends girlfriend.

that i can understand, but cmon, we guys have school on weekdays too.

and now iskandar is pissed, and i'm mildly pissed

but its going to be fine, i think he knows what must be done.

but the main message for story 2 is

yes, learn to organise your time. friendships, family and girlfriends are important, stuff, but learn to organise the time separately, and i mean SEPERATELY

it's not nice for girlfriends and friends to mix, since none knew each other

i hate stubborn bastards, and story one is living proof

i wonder if the people out there would even REALISE that their friends are indirectly helping them

and instead, they get blinded by self centered greed, as in the 'I WANT HER, YOU CAN'T HAVE HER' attitude

as a result, the friendships are off

i tried ways to explain it to that fat bastard in story one, but it seems that he think he is God, and won't even make a sound to me

oh well, i'm not the type for mushy crap like these, to explain all stuffs and make it a happily ever after

but the next person who have this case, i'll definitely help too

and if they get eaten by greed, yeah, i have methods to make both of them, male and female, to suffer

and i mean it

i expose my claws when necessary, and this is necessary

rawr

cash

2008-04-03T04:20:00.002+08:00

money money money

really makes the world go round

saving the shit out of myself just to go for a 1 month backpack tour

japan/europe/america

fark nigel, making me jealous of his holiday to europe

i'm even more obsessed with caucasians already

still wanna go to winsconsin, just because i miss a particular someone

sigh

zzz

2008-02-03T11:37:00.000+08:00

really sucky week

the fucking lecturer gave me an immediate -20 score just because i had completed my work and idling around

wtf is this? is there such a record in the school rules??????????

looks like the score will be a D, or less

and there goes a good grade

fucking pussy bitch

recap of 2007

2007-12-26T00:58:00.001+08:00

the first few is like...... ok, let's go to the recent events

it's 26/12/07 now, and my birthday's coming tomorrow, and woot, my family's gonna take me out, and so are my friends

and there'll be an outing again with my friends on 29/12/07

and there's a forum outing on 30/12/07

i really gotta sleep early though

but the best thing that has happened in my life is ................ my birthday, again!

i'm sure everyone thinks that too, huh?

we had a dinner on the cafe swiss on the eve of xmas, and the food's great, but let's not go too much of the details

let's take a look at the dishes, it's buffet, btw, and it's a whooping 59 bucks!!!

the main food that caught my attention is the medium-rare beef soaked with a little of red wine (the bottom of the dish)

then the turkey...

then the oyster(yeeech)

then the dessert

and last but not least, the fondue!!!!!!! watermelon is the best(and only one i would eat)!!!!!!

and the gang called the staff to sing me a birthday song, which was unexpected

so yeah, that goes for xmas, and off to the new year, which i look forward too

so, my new year's resolution is to........... i dunno, find a gf? nah, just stay in this way.

what's yours?

hates

2007-11-20T22:21:00.000+08:00

you know what i hate now? purely attention seeking kiddy girls, also known as xmms

they wear clothes with lots of cleavage potential, but they have no boobs to show

they make stupid profiles for themselves in friendster, and added anonymous people, saying they want friends, and making some pictures of different angles

and the worse thing is, hot blooded kiddy males known as xdds actually think they are hot, and cute

they probably think every girl they seen with photoshopped pictures in friendster looks cute

and to think they are enjoying the attention, making ridiculous comments like, "do i know you?" when they added the people themselves, and with guys making "hi, wanna intro?"

and i have no idea why they want to do that

it's prosperous.

no friends? or just to showoff to their friends on, "hey, i have a friend in friendster, and he is soo handsome!"

get a life, will you all?

and a life doesn't mean the usual bugis hideout for potential usual black halloween costumes where you go pout your lips like some kind of lip cramp and open your eyes like in a lasik operation, or the usual neighbourhood void deckhideout where you can find your so called gangster boyfriends that can protect you in times of financial need and abandon you when there are further complications

So have you done anything that's constructive in your life or to the society in all these years?

probably not, all you care about is yourselves, and your life, alone, and nobody knows what your life is about, right?

what the fuck do you even complicate your own lives for? just for the sake of getting attention?

and there is something that is very very disturbing, and irks me. a lot.

they attract attention by slashing their wrists, with multiple slash marks, and taking pictures of it, and posting it on the web

and somehow, they think it's cool.

wtf, by inflicting pain on yourself, will induce what? people saying you are brave? i will only sympathize you on your stupidity, i pity your parents, you must have been something they want to abort years ago

and the dumb thing is, even the guys are doing that.

they carve the names of their short term girlfriends, and vice versa

=_="

well, i hope they rot, get HIV, or die, or something

updates of life

2007-11-19T23:18:00.000+08:00

i just realized, it is not poly life that i hate
it is the DISTANCE to poly that i hate, which takes an agonizing 45 minutes

and it took me a freaking 2year + to find out

and i will not describe the recent happenings around me, as i am too forgetful and forgotten most of the stuffs

and as for today's interview with a bald ass, i forgot the attire, and i had to rush a cab back home to get changed, which wastes my precious time for traveling and money

i should really play brain age on ds again

and where the hell is heidi? haven't seen her for sooooo long

and my driving test is two weeks later, i think i will fail

oh nevermind, there's always a first for everything

and fate, destiny or whatever, even though i don't believe in all of these, here's what i think of you.

FARK YOU, MAKE ME PASS MY DRIVING

this aside, i realized i am too relaxed in things

i don't even feel anything in anything

and i always have the mellow feeling

is that good or bad?

and this thing is making me forgetful too, lol

updates

2007-10-04T01:50:00.000+08:00

yeah, life is nice now, here's a little something:

holidays... yet again

2007-08-31T01:40:00.000+08:00

i'm too lazy to blog nowadays, so i'll just do a little summary.

yeah, exams ended well, i hope i can get a 3.2 for my GPA.

and i'm going to hong kong next week(turkey, aus cancelled)

and i have no job

and most of all, I AM BORED!

so here's a little something to keep yourselves occupied

cheers, happy holidays!

sorry, my friends. i have been neglecting my msn, and haven't been replying you

i'll try to get back to the comp asap, i promise =D

http://www.toysforyourblog.com/games/bigred/bigred.swf

exams

2007-08-15T01:30:00.000+08:00

exams are just around the corner, next week

and the motivation isn't there

SOMEONE PLEASE FORCE ME TO STUDY!!!!

6 years+

2007-07-24T00:22:00.000+08:00

it's being so long, and you would dump us just because of her?

well fine, maybe i should snap myself out of my own fairy tale and let you enjoy yours for a good 5 years more

don't come flocking back to us, whining about her new bf and shits

if you see this, fuck you.

developing...

2007-07-17T01:11:00.000+08:00

i've always think that i am too dependent on my parents, and on people.

somehow, i cling on them too much.

and damn, i wanted to break the dependency on them. there are people who will somehow get frightened and avoid me, although none had happened before.

but well, i'm going step by step to grow out of it.

since when i grow up, the dependency will fade, and independence will show.

but then, the bonds will become weaker.

how the hell can i keep a good balance between that?

...

2007-07-15T16:05:00.000+08:00

there really are times that i feel that i'm too much of a busybody.

so from now on, i'm not going to give a fuck over anyone's problems, other than myself.

time

2007-07-14T04:20:00.000+08:00

as time passes by, i see people all grown up or growing up, while new life regenerates all over again

everyone wants to live forever, and nobody wants to.

all the leftover time reserved for me to die is promising and deliciously interesting.

i wonder how would i die and how my whole story would end up with.

looking at my past was great.

my future and end..... it excites me like a drug

yum.

quiz!

2007-07-12T03:27:00.001+08:00

You scored as Lara Croft, A thrill-seeking, slightly unscrupulous,
tough-as-nails archaeologist, Lara Croft travels the world
in search of ancient relics perhaps better left hidden.
She packs two Colt .45s and has no fear of jumping off buildings,
exploring creepy tombs, or taking on evil meglomaniacs
bent on world domination.

Lara Croft

83%

Indiana Jones

79%

James Bond, Agent 007

79%

Maximus

75%

The Terminator

67%

Batman, the Dark Knight

63%

The Amazing Spider-Man

63%

Captain Jack Sparrow

58%

Neo, the "One"

54%

William Wallace

54%

El Zorro

42%

Which Action Hero Would You Be? v. 2.0
created with QuizFarm.com

issues

2007-07-11T01:22:00.000+08:00

i had a little chat with a friend just recently, and i've been thinking.

i have been asking myself with these questions, what do young people nowadays want a relationship for? for experience? for sex? for love?

in very seldom cases, the couples in secondary school will make it as married couples in the future.

and why are the numbers that little?

probably that people wanted to have a relationship to experience what it is like in it, and most people are not really committed to it, most just want it for a short term.

and it's ridiculous.

as everyone knows, it's usually the female party(guys sometimes) who will get hurt in the end of the short term r/s, and in the end, all kinds of things can happen, be it slashing of wrists, committing suicide, or whatever.

as i've seen recent cases happening around us, it's worrying me.

just last week, a promising singer of a local band committed suicide just because of a simple relationship problem.

and i chatted with another friend and discovered that his girlfriend is just sucking his money away, there was not even a trace of what you would call love.

although it's a hug as he said, it's a clever gimmick to keep him on.

and i advised him to breakup with her, he did, and was heartbroken for a few days, he's ok now btw.

and i've discovered that he has known her for just a mere 1 month!

if the couple are ready for a relationship, they should really get to know each other first, be it interests, dislikes and lots more.

the most important thing, love is a feeling, it comes to you automatically, not something that you can get it just by pursuing it.

just to make it short: unless you're ready for a relationship, don't even think about it. the experience and stuff are bullshit. more people are going to be hurt this way.

crushes are just a way of saying you admire him/her for their actions, but there is a line between.

relationship and crushes are 2 different things, although there are little people who think about that.

anyway, please, no more of the so called 'short term' relationships, if you're in it already, then stay with it, too bad then.

i'm sick and tired of all the problems people post in a forum. If you have problems, you're not ready. and if you're not ready, don't follow the trend.

if you see a classmate with a girlfriend and you feel something in yourself, that doesn't mean that you need one. you envy them.

and let it be envy, no sense doing it on impulse, like most young people do nowadays.

they can meet the person once and 'fall in love' in the same day.

as for me, i'm not ready and don't want to.

what matters is that you're happy the way you are.

and let's go to issue two.

click here

in a nutshell, there's a particular restaurant in Taiwan which created a trend, they boil the fish alive in boiling oil and leaving the head alone, making it still alive and suffering a slow and painful death.

just for the sake of saying that their food is fresh.

sadistic brutes. i can't do anything about it though, but at least i'm against it.

thank goodness i'm not Taiwanese.

i wonder what does it feel like to stab them thousands of times and leaving them for dead?

sweet revenge for our fishy friends, divine justice for them.

earth day

2007-07-08T01:53:00.000+08:00

hmm

although it's earth day today, is everyone doing their part to save the world now?

for me, i'll try to use the aircon once every 3 days, instead of everyday, and try to reduce it to once a week.

as for the 3Rs, i think i'll try to make full use of the little things in my daily life. recycling... hmm

as for the concert which is 24 hours, i think it's ridiculous.

i wonder wtf is it all about?

although creating awareness about global warming, can we take up the initiative to do a part for our world we live in?

think about this:

after the concert, litter will definitely be around

resources will be wasted for the electricity used.

although this isn't associated with global warming, but this is also abit of a pollution, don't you think?

global warming plays a big part to the degrading of the earth, but pollution plays a part too.

right after the two days, would the inhabitants of our beloved planet continue to do the same?

i do love earth, and so should everyone.

readers, try to help out in every thing you can.

what i'm trying to do may be insignificant, but many hands make light work.

i'm sure all of us can contribute to the world, both young and old alike. :D

( =_=" ) aftermath

2007-07-08T01:28:00.000+08:00

hmm

friday ain't that bad

in fact it was kind of cool.

i joined shawn's group and there was laughter all along, now, i'm beginning to enjoy fridays more :D

and happy 48th birthday mom!

boy, she was damn happy over it, dad got tickets to a dinner in a boat and invited a few of our relatives.

she was practically smiling all the time, which made me happy too, but i'm too tired so i fell asleep after the dinner buffet in the boat!

there are some cool pics that i've managed to get from the sky, here it is:

i wanted to have a pic of myself with the scenery, but my cheeky unk was there to flash a pose!

and anyway, everyone was happy.

all my moods have been taken away by the sea and the sky, i feel so... free.

Happy B'day again Mom! Love you!

=_="

2007-07-06T04:27:00.000+08:00

ever been in a class where all the girls are sluttish and the guys are thinking and talking about sex all day?

well, i have, tommorow

yay~~~~~~ =_="

wtf.

maybe that's the reason i don't mix well on fridays

Miss Zarina is cool, but not them, but not them.

six weeks, 1 week down, 5 more to go...

business etiquette and image(that module/subject) is good, but the class suck.

at least the other days in the weekdays aren't like that.

anyway, i've got to buck up a little from my world of slacks, and do good in my grades

i don't want to break my own promise of getting a >3 GPA

otherwise, i'll be so angry with myself

projects piling up, one done, more comes

and other than schoolwork,

knn

fucking mailman

6 envelopes of Utada United 2006 DVD to Amanda, and none succeded.

Casshern made it in just one try

i wonder what happened.

maybe i'll try again

and she's not online, sigh.

mad

2007-07-05T03:33:00.000+08:00

as the title goes, i am in love

in love with her voice, her everything.

but does she feel the same?

insecurities happen all the time.

if only guys can be smarter

to make her happy, make her smile, make her laugh all the time...

sigh

2007-06-25T01:31:00.000+08:00

school's coming over the next day

what do i do?

grrr

oh well, challenges in life, challenges in life

"life is a challenge, face it and fight it bravely."

"the losers are the ones lying on the battleground"

day 2: vietnam

2007-06-07T00:25:00.000+08:00

here's day 2.

vietnam's 'Istana'. Although they don't have a president, it's still there

figure the other pics yourself =D

it's all in the house btw.

day 3 coming soon!

vietnam galore!

2007-05-29T22:09:00.000+08:00

just returned from vietnam!

and i have this tendency to type and e behind, which makes it vietname

don't really know why, but i'll definitely go there again!

as for the people who hasn't gone there, i'll give you a quick photo-tour!

DAY 1 (25/05/07)

arrived at the airport, with no pics =D

forgot to take them out though

sooo, we went to a 4 star hotel, and stayed the night there

ok, i need to catch some zzz for tomorrow

moods

2007-05-18T18:22:00.000+08:00

fucking moody today, maybe it's because i stay at home too much.

anyway,
that's so freaking true

i'll posts the pics for the bukit timah trip sometime

You Are 50% Left Brained, 50% Right Brained

The left side of your brain controls verbal ability, attention to detail, and reasoning.

Left brained people are good at communication and persuading others.

If you're left brained, you are likely good at math and logic.

Your left brain prefers dogs, reading, and quiet.

The right side of your brain is all about creativity and flexibility.

Daring and intuitive, right brained people see the world in their unique way.

If you're right brained, you likely have a talent for creative writing and art.

Your right brain prefers day dreaming, philosophy, and sports.

Are You Right or Left Brained?

post of whines

2007-05-06T01:18:00.000+08:00

grrr don't you just hate those ulcers? firstly i got 2, then the third one is appearing... maybe i really should sleep early following mom's advice... i would really appreciate advices on the tagboard on the -------->

anyway, i don't really have too much time to blog now, so i'll make it short and sweet, cos there's only one comp currently; bro's comp went for repairs; sis's comp taken to dad's company. really feel the need for my comp now, which i have a feeling of the honors for having the most privilege, know what i mean?

and the usual happened today, nighttime dinner, and then grandma's house, and i have a new habit of calling grandma's name by her name :D makes me have that deeper sense of closeness don't you think?

anyway, i went to sungei buloh wetland reserve today, it's a good thing it didn't rain. HS can's make it at the last minute.... again! with a dumb excuse such as "i need to open the door for my sis."

wtf.

his sis is P5 now, dammit. not spoonfed anymore. opening the door somemore. in the end, khairul, jianxun and moi went for it.

kranji at 11am, reach at 11:15am. khai was whining about how expensive on how the shuttlebus fare was and how much he can't use his concession and stuff.

rubbish la, i also concession and i'm not complaining. don't be so much of a imran(giam siap) leh... even darling jx isn't complaining...

and to think a mere area of mangrove region would cost us a whooping 4 HOURS++ of our time! it's amazing what nature can do, makes you feel that you have to have a good look at them.

i realised that other than the education, the technology that's in us today, all of us really need to unwind ourselves, just give ourselves a good time, to pamper yourself.

and that's what nature comes in.

have you ever had a feeling that even if you have all the good technological gadgets at home, you'll still feel a sense of something being left out? going to the wilderness once in a while gives me a fresh sense of excitement, makes me feel like a kid, observing, exploring, trying to discover every bit of the world around us, step by step.

well that's the reason why i had taken a large interest in nature, which i'm quite an environment sucker and a lousy trekker; i get tired easily. i get easily disgusted when i saw litter on the trails. the world is so much changing constantly, at such an astonishing rate.

so my advice to readers, other than the shopping centre that you always go to, why now spent a few hours of your time to look at the world without air-conditioning, while natural winds takes over?

trust me, you'll have a good feeling that it's all worth the while, even though you're tired.

i'm awfully tired, but i'm happy too, here's my proof.

i took a shocking 426 photos with my phone alone! four hours!! even i don't believe it.

sort of a proof that i'm a nature sucker.

i don't really have to post all 426 pics right? so i'll pick a few of the best ones. you'll see it below.

oh yes, bukit timah on next Saturday? me looking forward to it.

and i heard khai saying he wanted to climb mount kinabalu??

don't think so much 1st la, think mount FABER 1st
it's not even a mountain, much lesser of a hill.

anyway, it's e learning week for my school, so 1 week of freedom.

bah, humbug, i don't wanna talk about my hates though.

and sore throat coming up......

KNN!

i must say, i'm quite a good photographer
me looking at a certain idiot jumping in a no entry zone
love the clouds!
isn't he precious? he was very photogenic, allowing us to take a good pic of him before he left. if only i can hug him, so cute...
ya, no link with the topic cos it's too common, but i saw him at the entrance and he purposely posed there for me to take a pic

and my phone left 9% of power! lucky me...

hope you readers like it :D

language

2007-04-21T01:39:00.000+08:00

let's just say my dream of learning japanese, french and portugese isn't going that well. maybe i'll drop portugese, cos it isn't as well known though.

oh man, pressuring myself is tough. bucking up in this semester also means to have a good foundation/knowledge/paying attention to the language/teacher.

4 hours of never ending writing of notes, changing the words to my own knowledge of pronounciations are the tough part. sure, i had no problems with the alphabets, but the numbers are the worst.

i mean, pronouncing 80 means 70+10, which means saying out 70 and 10 combined. wow, comletely different from the chinese/english. looks like 6 weeks of horror will keep pressing on. persevering is ok, but it's not just one subject, it's 5! and i had to revise the stuffs i had learned in class everyday!

ok, my group isn't completely the best one in the world, at least they do work when they're needed, but crappy pieces of junk that contains lack of concentration of the question is killing me! and it's always me doing the work and the next, it's gone for them to copy. i don't mind that, but at least let me finish writing?

and it's almost half of the class came looking for me. oh well, it's the other half of the class that i loathe, but i'll explain it next time.

maybe i should have taken japanese. it's always in my 1st choice.

oh heck, what's past is past, no sense brodding over it. i'm going to learn it sooner or later. i'll break my personal ethnics if i did not learn japanese and french in my life.

and well, as the post stated earlier, it's the same.

i'm a pretty relaxed, don't care about anything attitude from the outside, but as similiar as most males, i value my pride.

i made a promise to myself, soooo i can't break it, i'll be a breakdown to myself, my ethnics, my pride. hey, that's the main power that pushes confidence of humans to the limit.

and to think of past actions which i made promised myself to finish it, i'd always get the job done, immediately. it's amazing on how it pushes me right?

i'm usually lazy, but it's that thing that makes me, that makes everyone useful.

i wonder if i had said this before, but i'll say it again.

everyone has a purpose in life, you live to find it. some people find it easily, some people find it after obstacles. the ones who find it easily will have hindrances which they must overcome to fulfill it. the ones who found it after obstacles can relax, their task is over and they are truly happy.

i'm on the first one, i already found it, but i had to learn, observe, discover the world and myself which i had not done completely. it's grueling, but it's all worth it at the end of the day.

well it's the end of my blogging, got a driving theory practice(final theory) tomorrow.

it's amazing i think so much at night, i don't usually think that much in the daytime.

and i'm not emotional, i'm just stating out my inner thoughts.

hope you readers know what i'm talking about, i know my powers of reasoning stink.

and vivian, when are you gonna burn the dvd?

studies

2007-04-17T00:47:00.000+08:00

heck with the make-more-friends policy of mine.

diss it away, and study like crap for the 2 years.

and achieve my traveling dream.

no more lazing around, no more sleeping, no more talking.

from now on it's study and study.

but i'll keep in contacts with the people i'm in good terms to.

as for the ones that i don't talk much to, just fuck off.

aim for 3.5 for the next gpa, or higher.

honor rolls and others.

i don't want a cca, it hinders my studies.

now i finally realised my parent's thoughts, their actions, their reasons.

enlightenment, that's what it is.

making them proud is the least i can do to repay them.

so schoolmates, if you saw this, don't be surprised if i'm more quiet.

i'm going to get the top in class yes i do.

well, an occasional break from city life to nature life wouldn't hurt.

emo

2007-04-14T01:22:00.000+08:00

nowadays i feel nothing in everything i do.

maybe its because i stay at home too much?

i want to travel, but i dont have the fundings, the time

is it really my fate to be in singapore forever?

i'm seriously becoming emo.

maybe i'll cut my wrists

aper, u seriously believe all of that?

dumb!

okok, a little sad, maybe it's because the school is reopening next week, and i feel somehow excitement yet a sense of loss. maybe the holidaying mood is still on me. the thrill of learning french raises my spirits high, and on the other hand, the loss of learning japanese pulls down myself.

50-50 in everything is better, as i'll say. too much of a good thing is a bad thing, right?

oh well, life still goes on. french will be french. the most i'd do is to borrow or tell hansheng help me buy the learn japanese book. yet to learn portuguese but soon.

but seriously, going back to school sounds alot of my secondary school days, only more slacking. and what's worse, my grades dropped quite a bit. kinda depressed with myself, but oh well, i determine my future, my fate. and semester 3 is the term that i am going to buck up. hope there would be lesser projects cos they would just pull down my grades, because of free-loaders(you know who you are)

and i realised my french lecturer is a frenchman! whee!

the problem is, will he speak good english? or singlish? hope it's singlish, i'd really prefer him to talk that way.

and i seriously hope i wouldn't see the bengs in semester 1. they piss me off. with the kind of unwashed, messy hair they think they own the world. commanding people as they like and not doing a thing themselves. and licking balls at the day of submission.

as for bengs i meant the emo hair. ah beng hairs aren't ah beng, they're just vain.

i wonder how will my classmates feel when they see me?

such a big difference between sem 2 and 3. spiky hair unlike my term 2 nerdy ones, contact lenses and such. i must say, my friends say i look beng.

CRAP!

i don't really want to look beng. look at bugis. if i see a beng, they're usually like, pull a long face, and acting all cool and such. i wonder if i look like that, since i don't usually smile that often(that doesn't mean i'm angry, always a misconception). and when people see a beng they would usually be like " yuck, a gangster, better not piss him off ".

and i get ignored, looking like an outcast gangster.

oh man, can i change that? but it's my appearance that has changed, not my personality! hope i make more friends than make more enemies though.

and i officially declare that i broke out of my gambling addictions! i lost so much, i decided to quit. i have to say, it's maybe my willpower is so strong, i don't feel any sense of loss in betting, like "if i had bet on that i'd already won" and the kind of intellect that if i lost $ a little, i'll bet again to recoup my losses, which that never happens.

had to say, i experienced alot of stuffs, and learnt alot of lifeskills that i keep to myself and just pass it to you readers through the blog, cause i don't usually say out all this "weird" stuffs. it's amazing just what two months can do.

and well, recent news, my bro made it to NTU! happy for him, while on my other self, i started to think.

i had discussed it with a good friend too.

im turning 19 this year.

after poly i'll be 21. and comes army, which ends at age 23.

and if i take a crash course in university, i would either end my education at age 26(bachelor) or 27(honors)!

i wouldn't have a chance to take a breather. i'm turning old!

it's like the 20s were wasted. and the 20s is the best stage for myself to paint a future, to travel, to open my eyes around the world.

so much things, so little time.

i wouldn't want to travel in my 30s, since part of my travels is also a opportunity to find a life partner.

well singapore is fine with me, as long we click.

had to say, i clicked with quite a couple already. spend my life with them? maybe.(grin)

singapore isn't bad, but would you want to stay there all your life? just work until your dying days? yes, you can start a family, there's love.

singapore is big, and the world is so much bigger. just staying here for your whole life without going on the 'outside'?

well not for me.

i'm still brainstorming on whether to make it to university or not.

3-4 years can be put to work and earn some keep for a tour.

but 3-4 years of education can make me earn more.

i'm in a terrible dilemma for my future!

it's amazing that i can think far now. in the past i don't think that much.

and everytime when people hear about me not studying in university, they'll be like "that's so wasted" and be disgusted with me, with the thought that i didn't plan for my future properly and such.

it's just that, i don't say out loud about my thoughts. that's the main reasons i kept a blog. i'll be lost without it, i bet.

im already planning 15 years ahead. i picture myself on my deathbed, happily with an accomplished mission of my life: to find the one i truly love, to continue my family line, to travel around the world, and learn about the world. there's so much things to do, and i just cant reach it.

but hey, i'm not going to die now, now until i succeed in my life. death comes last. i won't die that easily.

im such a big fish in a little pond, with great ambitions and mindsets about the ocean that's so near, but so far.

well i'm only 19 now, why think so much? the serious planning comes after army, and it's good to plan now.

well maybe i'll go overseas to study in a university, it's 2 years there.

but i'll surely get a pet to raise. choices are, a chinchilla or a dog. i'd love to raise an animal which can think, have a sense of warmth, like they can listen to commands, play with them , a sense of love with them, unlike hamsters who only know how to eat, sleep and die.

i'm proud to be a human. to be able to think better than animals. we can plan about the tommorow, which animals can't. they are stuck with the iron resolve to live, hunt, mate and die.

we are different, we can change our future. every path we take, any path we take. the only thing is to think of the consequences, be it good or bad.

and i feel a sense of disgusted sympathy toward people who committed suicide. why waste it? people who die on accidents can't help it, so why do you kill yourself?

i laugh at films. at real life, on deaths, at people who kill themselves. i laughed, with disgust. people who know me think of me as sadistic, to laugh at deaths. they don't know me.

just think of the MRT suicide trend for example. what a waste of time, a waste of yourself. you waste everybody's time. just to gain a temporary publicity, just to claim the insurance money for your family.

do you think you're cool? do you think you're heroic? i don't think so. you look stupid.

ok off to bed! a soccer game early tomorrow, and after that, SHOPPING! i'm not buying anything, just following iskandar along for his jacket-with-hood shopping, with hansheng, jianxun with khairul coming later on the day. 4 locations; clementi at Botak Jones to makan(eat), queensway shopping center, bugis, and lastly, vivocity(i wonder why is this place so popular? with the overpriced stuff to attract foreign people).

seriously i feel so much better now blogging, and typing out my thoughts on everything, sort of clears out the junk that's on my mind. no wonder people wanted to blog. they wanted to dump out the excess stuffs in their thoughts, haha.

and my head feels lighter, LOL.

life

2007-04-07T17:37:00.000+08:00

created a new one, since i quit from that, out of ideas, out of stuff to blog on, seems so dead though... so looks like it's a brand new start for my blogging stuffs, my blogging views.
so i closed it, and there it goes, new blog all over again, i discovered not all blogs had to go through stylish designs to be popular, such as my very gd fren khai who changed from an emo blogskin to an ordinary blogskin, seems like he's eager to hide his emotions? :D

but anyway, i created a blog again because there is so much things to rant about since the date i closed my blogger's blog before, i don't see why i had to bottle up all my emotions and burst it out on others, it just doesn't seem right.

ok, back to the reasons why i had to blog.

blogging gives me a new lease of life.

i won't blog regularly, just blog to rant, or comment or whatever.

let's just say i had matured since my poly year 1 days.

i learnt too much from my role model, my brother.

to dine at the finer places, to dress, to look nice, and the most important of all, to find myself.
i realise i had done alot of soul searching on myself during my poly year 1, had to say it's the most crucial part of my life, whether to change my attitude to a fierce, quiet, or sad or whatever mood you can think of.

and that's what i learnt from my brother.

not to dresss, but to be happy. be what you are. seriously dressing comfortably is the way to go, never think of how people would look at what you wear, you are what you wear. being happy is the ability of making yourself and the people around you happy too.

now on the dressing part(i've gone out of point i think), wearing contact lenses is a new thing for me, but i had to try it. there's always a first for everything, for everyone. take me for example. i was the timid kind of person in secondary school, gotten bullied, gotten scolded and such.

i learnt, to learn from the mistakes and learn from the mistakes, such as:
take the lighter scoldings with a smile, and retaliating the heavier scoldings. i learned to speak up for myself, for my friends on what we feel, instead of always scolding them on the back and act as if nothing happen(well an occasional one wouldn't hurt).

being bullied is quite about the same.

in the past, when people talk about me(fat, and any other weird associations) about me, i'll simply keep quiet. but now, when these things happen, i'll just laugh it off, and just admit i'm THAT character they're talking about, and just clown around for laughs, and then what i can do to improve my problem that makes them saying it to me. well i must say i lost quite A LOT of weight. it's better to make everyone happy right? all for the fun of it. childishness appears in anyone, not on people who ACTS mature.

in poly presentations, i was the timid one, doing work and presenting the least, resulting me with the lowest marks for presentation, ALWAYS.

self confidence plays a very, very big part in the path of life. i held up my timid attitude and presented it, and in the end it didn't felt that bad too. self confidence makes you held your head high in life, unafraid to handle challenges, and the part and parcel of life.

and i must say, family make you grow physically, while friends make you grow mentally.

when the thought suddenly flashed to my mind, i truly agree with it. it's true, look at the society. you can see gangsters roaming around while there are geeks talking about. why are they in groups? peer influence. influence plays a very big factor in the human life. it determines the mindset to your life. and since most people make friends mostly at the teenage age, it's no wonder the elderly made a comment such as the teenage stage of a person is the most crucial in life.

since i had forgotten what i was about to rant about, let me just describe what i've experienced today.

there's a new game in town, and it's taking the world by storm! Command and Conquer 3: Tiberium Wars, sure to attract people, which includes gaming geeks and casual gamers, promising wide gaming varieties... which i can't play =_="

now the real ranting starts now.

on my computer first. this fucking piece of scrap metal. i know that i bought you just for less than 2 years, but you're driving me crazy! all my friends are playing the best high end graphical games they can find while i cant! why can't the technology upgrade slower? computers are created in less than a hundred years and yet it's 'exploding' like crazy!

this is quite a short rant, since i had gotten used to the ranting from myself, and i had quelled my anger for a short while. angry with myself, angry for buying a computer so soon........ isn't the option.

now i'm going to reveal the truth i discovered. our motive to life, our reason to live.

it's simple. happiness.

happiness is the mood, the emotion that drives us, that motivates us, that pushes us to look at life the different way, looking at it with a smile, managing it in a more pleasing manner.

why are couples able to live to a ripe old age? to married for the many years to come?

it isn't love, it's happiness.

have you ever heard of the speech, 'to love someone is to make someone happy"?

well you've got it.

love is just a simple road for humans to find happiness, while people tend to realise it the hard way. they just simply don't understand their meaning of life.

all the love songs, all the lyrics, they just meant one thing. happiness.

i found it in the shortest time, i had alot of time for soul searching, by new experiences in life, new challenges that binds me.

a newborn child looks in the newfound world as i am looking at it now. such expressions of happiness from the baby creates tears, tears of happiness from his/her parents, and from the baby themself. happiness is the power that relieves from all pain and suffering. a smile can overcome obstacles, make the people around you feel the same way you do.

if laughter is the best medince, happiness the the prevention.

i realised i'm kind of inspirational at this kind of the day, 5am in the morning! i just couldn't keep my thoughts bottled up. it's better to share it with the readers here.

if you have nothing to do, be it at home or outdoors, just force yourself to do things that will make you comfortable, to be happy. the thrills of life causes yourself to test yourself further, allowing you to find yourself further.

as for me. i've found what i wanted. love isn't everything. happiness is. it's often a guided misconception on teens around the world, not just singapore itself. making youself happy is the thing to do, not forcing yourself to put a fake smile just to make people happy while you make a soot face inside.

well as i went on the path to find myself, i founded that i had two personalities! everyone has two too.

but for me, i would be noisy the first, and intellectual the next. i'm rather common in that too. intellectual means the deep thinker kind, which also means quiet. i think alot when in that 'mode' and it just appears anytime. my close friends would have seen that already. when at there, thousands of thoughts would fill in in my mind, be it walking past a man or a dog, or just with my friends when i stop talking. it would even be the latest events coming to town, what the people around me are thinking of judging from their body language, it could even be when my friends are down and what i would do to make them laugh, thinking of my past actions and more. there are tons more, which had just zoomed past me. it's kind of like the subconscious part of the brain, if you know what i mean.

time runs way too fast. it's ok if you're wasting time. as long as you know what you are doing, it's fine. as for myself, i often recall them, and think of the moments, the moments of timeslots where you feel good and bad.

well finally it's the end. catching some sleep for some casual badminton tomorrow. anyone?

well all comments and quotes are from myself, not from webs, it's my intellectual side talking, if i'm right. my noisy side doesn't appear too often, appears only to the people i recognise more. 'it' needs rest too. i wonder if i'm a retard?

feel free to comment too. i'm open to flames too. to improve myself, and yourself.

hope it helps to people who can't find themselves, suicidal people. because life isn't all down. if you recall the happier times that you've relieved, you wouldn't find yourself frowning already right?

and happy easter.......... it's over?